What the hell.
There is really sth wrong with the bloody blogger.
Cant change fonts! eek! >.<

okay nvr mind..
content more important.
Went to the funeral ytd night with Sherman.
Cause they were having service, so i chat with Sherman for like almost an hour.
But my brother dont know ate what, all of a sudden become sick then start puking.
Tsk, i think he didnt eat or what. but he was better today.
Hmm then went home at ard 10pm cause needa bring him home.
Then was really tired.
But couldnt sleep. Keep thinking about stuffs. ):
Then in the end, i realised that i was crying..
Sounds like depression right? lol.
Haix. Seriously i think i need a mental doc with me.
then i cried till tired then slept. Dont know what time.

Woke up at ard 8.15am today.
Checked my phone. Yee shuen text me ask for address.
I also dont know so i ask her to ask Jane. In the end, Jane ask her to ask me. -.-
Funny lurh. So in the end i ask MY FRIEND directly for his address.
It was the last day of the funeral.):
i was really sad. i went for piano, but didnt have the mood to play. Was waiting for time to pass.
Then went there at ard 10am.
He looks okay, but i know he is forcing himself to look okay.
then nt long after, we have to sing the songs then walk round the coffin to look at the deceased for the last time.
It was really sad. I controlled so that i wont cry. Yee Shuen also like gonna cry like that.
Then at ard 10.45am, we headed for the crematory at Mandai.
Gosh, when i see the deceased's sister keep asking her when will they meet again,
i totally cant take it. I cried out.. heartache..
Then took the bus there.
The pastor like say alot. i am not a christian so i dont know what is the thing called.
Some parts i heard lurh really cant tahan so cried out.
I see MY FRIEND like trying not to cry out, trying to hold back like vry brave.
i cry even harder. Sad for him. really sad.
Then next went to the viewing hall.
Gosh thats the worst part.
everyone was crying hard. i was crying too. ): see the coffin moved into the place.
i was thinking what if one day its my relative that pass away, i dont know how will i look like.
i think i would be crying 24hr.
so in all i cried for one whole week alr.. hais.
Then ard 12 plus. took bus back. Met Yee shuen there. she should have just come with us lorh so that i could cry with her cause Jane they all even though sad also wont cry.
i cry alone very weird.
Hmm then got home at ard 2pm. was really tired, so slept.
Woke up at 3.30pm. Then dad send me to tuition. was vry tired and having headache.
then after that came home, dinner and use com till now.
I feel like going out now! :(

Hais.. somebody told me the reason he ignore me.
Maybe i am really that bad. i am the wicked one.
Going ard messing up ppl's life.
To that guy : really sry. its a wise choice to ignore me i guess even though i feel hurt.
nvr mind then. i dont want to hurt you either. enjoy with your gf now.. dont look at me. there is dont need to..

Hais. i am such a failure. gosh i really dont knw what to do and how to react. ):
How? i still have the feelings i guess. its all coming back. but i dont wanna hurt anyone. so i guess its better to keep a distance. yeah.
Hais. i think thats all for today. totally no mood any more..
gonna cry again i think...